Someone asked me: “Why can’t you just be happy? Why can’t you just enjoy the present?” – that made me think. Why can’t I? I know I brought this same thoughts here before but it is always good to talk about what we are feeling. Always the same questions on my mind. Why am I so worried about what’s going to happen in my future? Why do we have to make so many plans and then get worried if we can’t make them to happen? So many “whys”.
I believe that everything is a matter of balance. We should make plans but try to enjoy the moment and not get too worried about what is going to happen in the future. We have a saying in Portuguese that is “O futuro ainda ninguém o viu” which translating could be “No one saw the future yet”. And that actually makes more sense if you say it in Portuguese, but is also so true. Why worry about something we can’t control or see at this point.
I understand that, for some people, it is normal to make a plan and then not get too worried about it and just go with the flow. But for someone with anxiety it isn’t that simple. For example, I always make plans but because I get so worried about not being able to make it happen, I just give up before I even start doing something or I start doing something but never really invest too much in making it work because I am too scared!
My plan right now is to get well and actually it is working thanks to my psychologist, family and friends. So thank you to all of them for being here for me and always listen to what I have to say. When I say I am getting better, it means that I’m not having as many panic attacks as before I’ve started therapy, I can control it better and not waking up anxious and worried all the time is so good I can’t even explain.
And I’m so happy with my “small” progress. Of course everyone is different but with the right help we all can get better, as long as we accept we need help and ask for it. So please, don’t be afraid of telling people that you don’t feel well, sometimes all we need is someone to listen to us and tell us we are not crazy, we just have some issues to sort out.
So, never forget that “A little progress every day adds up to big results”.
Stop being just as happy as your mind allows you to be and start fighting those bad thoughts so you’ll be as happy as you want to be! – At least that’s what I’m trying to do myself.